Men and Women on Sex: How to Enjoy Lovemaking to the Fullest

Sex life is not the most crucial part of relationships, but it is important, and if it's not satisfying, something is missing. Finding a unified opinion on what is ideal in bed is challenging.

Relationship and sex counsellor Tracey Cox has dedicated many years to her research. Based on a wide range of insights from many men and women of different ages, sexual orientations, and life stages, she compiled a basic overview that could help many others answer their questions. The overview was published by the Daily Mail.

MEN ON SEX

Constructive Feedback:

“Getting any feedback from your partner shouldn't be taken as criticism,” said one of the men. When his partner suggested during sex that he "go faster" or "slow down," he initially took it as a complaint. Later, he realized she wasn't criticizing him but guiding him towards what she found pleasurable.

Similar Libido:

“If you don't want to spend your life complaining about a poor sex life, try to find someone with a similar sex drive.”

Stay Focused:

“Fully immerse yourself in the moment. It's pretty easy to tell when you're making love to someone whose mind is elsewhere.”

Use a Vibrator:

It's a myth that men don't enjoy sex when a woman uses a vibrator. On the contrary, according to many men, watching a partner who knows how to please herself can add a whole new dimension to lovemaking.

Ensure Privacy:

If you have kids at home, make sure they won't walk in on you during sex. It's not just for your sake but for theirs as well.

Enjoy Sex:

A common piece of advice from men to women: Instead of focusing on being good in bed, try to always enjoy sex. If you do, men will be happy too.

WOMEN ON SEX

Don’t Ask If You Don’t Want to Know:

Although people tend to keep nothing hidden in a relationship and fulfil as many of their partner's wishes as possible, reality isn't always bearable. “Once, I asked my partner about his sexual fantasies. Since he told me he dreams of group sex, I've been paranoid and assume he doesn't enjoy sex with me. If you can't handle it, don't ask,” one woman shared.

Don't Be Afraid of Giving Compliments:

Another piece of advice from women to men: Don't be afraid to praise and express your feelings out loud. “When I'm naked, and a man tells me I'm sexy, it's much more seductive and attractive than the best bedroom technique,” notes another female.

Don’t Fake Orgasms:

Throughout her career, the relationship expert heard many insights from women that can help others enjoy better experiences.

“Faking an orgasm is pointless; nothing good comes of it. It's also unfair to your partner. If he can't bring you to climax, it’s okay. Don’t fake it; show him what makes you feel good,” says Cox.

Right Time for Sex:

The right time to have sex with a new partner is when you're really ready. There are no rules for this. Give yourself as much time as you need, and don't let anyone rush you into anything. The result will be worth it.

Important Facts About Sex:

• If you don’t talk openly about sex, you'll never fully enjoy it.
• Sex isn’t something that comes naturally. We're not born knowing how to make love; we learn it.
• Treat yourselves to a weekend alone—no obligations, family, kids, or work. If you can't manage a weekend, try at least a night together. Many couples find such moments break their usual routine. Our erotic wellness services can help with this, as many clients tell me that couples massages reawaken their desire to explore each other's bodies.
• Take the initiative as often as possible. If you always wait for your partner to initiate sex, you might wait forever.
• Don’t be afraid of oral sex—especially for women, it’s often the only reliable way to achieve orgasm.
• Foreplay is also sex.
• It's not your partner’s responsibility to get you in the mood for sex. If you want to make love, do everything possible to make it happen.
• Desire isn't the only motivation for sex—making your partner happy, creating a connection, and enjoying time together are also good reasons.
• Don’t negotiate. One time having sex your way and the next according to your partner's desires might sound like a great solution, but it’s not. Both partners should always be on the same page.
• The best orgasm is often the one you enjoy alone because you subconsciously don’t worry about others’ reactions.

Hopefully, you’ve learned something new or at least recalled the essentials. Life is mainly about the present moment, so enjoy it.